I've spent a month talking myself into and out of attempting a blog project.
My writing class has been helpful, to a degree, but it's becoming clearer to me that what I really need right now is practice. I can write, sometimes quite well, but I don't do it often enough to feel like I'm a writer, which is where I want to be. Nobody can be a musician if they only play their instrument for three hours a week, and it's silly of me to think that writing is any different.
But I procrastinate. I find other things to do. Not because I don't enjoy writing. I love it. But I have so much self-doubt that I'm afraid to put anything out there. Recipes and home improvement posts are one thing, but the "real" stuff is harder.
You see, I want to write a book. A real book, on paper. And Kindle, I suppose. I have vague ideas about what I want it to be, and I have some stories I need to build on. But I have no idea how to take my ideas and stories and make them into something people will enjoy reading. I need to find my voice. I need to learn to edit. I need a plan.
I got the idea, last month, to take some of these stories, as elemental as they are in their current form, and get them out of my head and into words. And I could build the stories around my beautiful Christmas ornaments, and make it an advent calendar of stories for the readers of my blog.
The problem with this is it's already December, and I only have one story written. I can spit out a story a day for the month, but I know that without more time to play with them and edit them, they won't necessarily be very good. If they're not good, I don't want to subject my readers to them. You see my quandary? If I can't do it well, I don't want to do it. But I should do it.
So I will do it.
The stories might be rough around the edges. Some may be written more like a memoir, some more "novel"-ish, and some might just be the bones. I seem to have multiple writing voices, which I need to learn to melt into one clear voice. That's really hard. But I'll do my very best to get one story, as polished as I can manage it, out each day through Christmas. Keep in mind that these are mostly meant to be components in larger stories - they're rough drafts. Bear with me, and maybe, hopefully, enjoy.